Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
apparently, "please pick me up from the airport" also means "i got drunk on the flight and need to give you roadhead in broad daylight"
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
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