I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
Randomize
