he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
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