Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
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