dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
Randomize
