i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
