this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
Randomize
