you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
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