i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
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