Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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