We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
Randomize