You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
Randomize
