So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
so that wasnt chicken after all
Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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