ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
Randomize
