beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
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