I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
Green mimosas i think yes
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
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