They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
