but the lizard people decide everything anyway
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
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