Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
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