what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
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