the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize
