Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
Woke up to a bottle of gatorade and a packet of saltine crackers tied to underwear hanging from my ceiling fan, along with 3 advil stuck to a piece of duct tape and a note saying "have a happy hangover- <3 you/me"
Drunk you is pretty stunner.
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
I forgot wine drunk hurts
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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