We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
Randomize
