Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
Randomize
