I just saw a hot homeless man
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
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