Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
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