Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
Did you just see the Batmobile???
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
Randomize
