a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
