There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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