Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
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