I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
I forgot i ate a salad for dinner, so while i was barfing in his toilet, i kept screaming "i ate leaves?? i cant believe you let me eat leaves!"
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
Best friends brother. Beat that.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
