I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
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