Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
