brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
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