its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
Randomize
