you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
Randomize
