that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Randomize
