He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
I introduced my face to asphalt last night. They didn't get along.
I bet he comes in French.
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
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