I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
Randomize
