Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
The beers last night were like the tears from god
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Randomize