in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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