Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
Randomize
