last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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