I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Randomize
