am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
Randomize
