Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
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