so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
If its not for food we ain't going out.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
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