I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
27 Common Occurrences Everyone Can Relate To But No One Talks About
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
21 People Intentionally Did Despicable Things During Sex
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
Randomize
