I can't watch pbs sober anymore
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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