to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
Vodka?
Forever.
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
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