Well apparently he's into motor boating.
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Randomize