i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize